Motivation

By now, most people know that I want to join the Peace Corps. If you are reading this, then you are one of them. But while most know of my desire, I really haven't had the opportunity to divulge to everyone the reasoning and motivations behind this huge life-changing decision. I will try my hardest to express in words what has always come up short in conversations past.

Peace Corps was not a decision I made lightly; it is not one that anybody can make lightly. It means committing twenty-seven months, over two years, of my life to service. It means moving away from everyone I know and love and everything that makes me feel comfortable and safe. It means immersing myself in a culture I know little about, in a language (or two) I know nothing about, all the while, trying to make a difference in these people's lives. I don't see how anyone could take this decision lightly.

I've always felt connected to the world on a very intrinsic level, and for that, I feel blessed. It has been what has guided me throughout my life and has led me to where I am today. It goes deeper than a the commonplace love of traveling that many share. There is only one word that I can think of that even comes close to how I feel, and even that explanation is borrowed from the Germans: wanderlust. Now that I've written it, it doesn't do this emotion justice. It is a feeling that with every country I visit, with every city I explore, with every road I wander down, and with every person I meet, I grow in a way I cannot explain. I learn more about myself and my life than I ever could at home. It is a natural high that the worst drug addicts can only pray to dream about, and I can feel it literally warming my body and making my fingers tingle when I experience another culture. It is why I have studied four different languages so far in my life. With each, I gain insight into another world and pick up a piece of myself along the way. It is no wonder I found Anthropology to be so fitting for me.

I had always known about the Peace Corps growing up, in the general sense that most Americans know of it. It wasn't until perhaps sophomore year of college, as I struggled with what I wanted from life in the coming years, that I really began researching and considering PC as a viable option for me upon graduation. The more I learned about it though, the more I came to realize how perfect it actually was for me. While I do not know exactly where my life will lead, I know I am destined for big things. If anyone has seen the movie Big Fish, I've always felt myself to be an Edward Bloom of sorts. It's not to say I think I am going to be a rock star, an actor, or anybody even remotely famous, but I know I am suppose to make a mark on the world. Peace Corps is a way for me to do this, even if it is a small mark on an even smaller part of the world. I have always felt blessed to have such an amazing life, and I want to use it to give back to the world. Until now, I have hardly ever used my skills and talents, not to mention my heart. Peace Corps will definitely exercise all of these, as well as my legs.

I am not afraid of what awaits for me in the Peace Corps. I am nervous, sure, but I've always loved that nervous feeling, like climbing to the top of the highest roller coaster or jumping off a bridge. My biggest concern is not the culture or the people or the food. It is whether my skills will be able translate into whatever job I do have so that I can actually make a difference in my job for a change. I am sure it will all work out. It always does.